High school AU open post

"No, we're not." It wasn't easy to say and even more difficult to actually hear, but he wasn't going to lie to Koschei, either. He had had to do that entirely too often for his tastes. "I'd like to be friends with you."

It still hurt to see him like this, but at least the knowledge that Koschei didn't hate him, not entirely, helped a little. Maybe he could get on with his life, at least a little. If he could, he'd only ever just go back into the past, back to the time when he couldn't have imagine anything like this situation. When he didn't feel like a coward, like an idiot and failure. Yes, he'd have liked that.

"Just friends," Koschei muttered under his breath, trying to ignore how much his heart ached at the thought. He loved Barty, he still talked about him endlessly and thought about him all the time, he just didn't know how he could ever win him back. Maybe he just couldn't. There wasn't a way, he had lost him. But he could still be friends. That was enough. For now.

"Maybe we shouldn't even do that," Koschei said finally, looking sadly at Barty. What had he done to his best friend and most dearest companion? Nothing positive. Beaten him, broken him, dragged him through the mud. He'd just taken every little petty thing out on him for no reason. "I'm an awful friend. I'm an awful person. I was doing so well and I had to go and ruin it. And I'm always going to ruin it because that's who I am. No wonder Theta stopped returning my calls."

He was toxic. And the greatest thing he could do for Barty was to leave him. Save him from this misery.

"Don't be silly, Koschei. Of course I want to be friends with you. And you know how flighty Theta can be, chances are he'll just be around in half a year or so and pretend it's only been a week." Barty offered a smile that was genuine enough, if not especially bright. "We've missed so many ridiculous superhero movies. They're no fun to watch without you."

"I can't watch movies here," Koschei said with a long sigh, slumped over the table looking about as fed up as he felt. Well, you know, mental hospitals aren't very fun. No one to talk to, nothing to do and nothing to watch. "My therapist says I need to earn more points to watch TV but to do that I have to go a group and talk about my feelings."

Which, as can probably be imagined, Koschei didn't do well. "I miss superhero films. And Theta. And you."

"Can you read books? Comics? Anything like that?" He ran his fingers through his hair, nervous but trying to relax. Trying to make the most of this, trying to make Koschei feel better. At least he had some expertise in that.

"I haven't watched any of them, so once you're out in a bit, we can watch them together. Well, maybe not all of them in one sitting, but you know what I mean. maybe Theta can come, too."

"I'm not allowed comics and only certain books that have to be picked through a careful system so I don't get distressed or overexcited," Koschei admitted, almost quoting his doctor in a very deadpanned manner. He didn't like this whole song and dance to amuse himself but he supposed this was his punishment. He'd tried to kill someone, he supposed he deserved a little suffering.

"We could, yeah," Koschei agreed, not sure if they ever would. He didn't know if the plans would stick but it was nice to be able to agree. "I'd like to. I'd like to do anything but stay here. Did they tell you how much longer I'd be stuck here?"

"Well. I'll try to figure out the system and maybe I can get some books through it anyhow." It didn't sit right with him that Koschei was being treated like that, although he knew that it was necessary. But it just wasn't the way it was supposed to be.

"No, I don't think they know for sure yet. But they said you're making very good progress. I can ask for more information, if they'll give me any."

"You'll have to ask them, I'm not allowed certain things. Can't have chocolate any more, because of the sugar. Apparently it'd bad for me," Koschei knew why he had to do these things and hey, it was better than prison. Which, admittedly, he was threatened with till they realised they couldn't get him out from under the table in the interview room. Then it became more and more obvious that something was wrong.

"Good, find out. And come back soon, no one really comes to visit. Well, my parents, but I don't want to see them," he could stand to look them in the eyes. Not after everything he was and how much he'd fallen. They'd never understand.

"I'll have to get a list. I wasn't sure what I could or should bring, so I brought nothing this time." Barty ruffled his own hair, swallowing. He wanted to hug Koschei, he wanted to hold him so badly. It almost physically hurt that he couldn't, knowing what a bad idea it might be. "Then next time I'll come bearing gifts. Promise. I wasn't sure you'd want to see me."

"I didn't," Koschei admitted, he had been so angry and so scared, not wanting to face him. And now, here he was, about to be left behind again because his visiting time was nearly over and not really feeling much better. He'd lost Barty, he had that officially confirmed, but that's all he got out of this meeting. He'd degraded himself pathetically by begging to go home and all he'd gained was a shred less of dignity. God, he hated this so much. "... Can I write to you sometime. I won't be able to send it but I can give you them next time you come or something. I'm allowed paper and pens."

High school AU open post

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