[ Well, this hadn't really worked with Jack, but that wasn't going to deter Johannes. The Master will simply find a notice tacked upon his door not long after his arrival.
The shared bathroom between our suites is not, in fact, shared at all. Please find another to use. I have nailed your door shut to prevent any accidents from happening as a courtesy to you.
And then, as before, the following afterthought is added:
[The Master removes the note the day it's posted without saying anything in return. He removes the nails, of course, as carefully as he can without making a fuss. He's very calm about the whole matter. Well, until the next day when John will find a note stuck to his door as well.]
Hi JC. Don't ever touch anything of mine again. Including the door. Not even to knock it. No touchy! Not ever. If you do, you may not like what happens next. Play with nails again, you'll find yourself having an accident. And nice try with the bathroom. It's shared, deal with it :)
All the love in the universe and best wishes, Harry Saxon xxx
[ Well. Threats were much, much more tolerable than Jack Harkness's reaction had been; Johannes would choose to be met with a threat of bodily harm than Jack naked and covered in bubbles in his bathtub again.
This next note will be slid beneath the Master's door. ]
Fine. If you disturb my specimens, however, the next head I keep in a jar will be yours.
[ And the 'specimens' he is referring are probably easy to determine as the animal (and some human) parts floating in a viscous liquid, kept tightly sealed in jars and stacked decisively on one side of the sink. It is a clear declaration of possession: this side of the bathroom was his. Or, you know, that was what he was trying to imply, at least. ]
[He doesn't really want to discuss what happened. Well, okay, he does. But not the dying part, more the drums part. But that could come later.]
A visit might be nice, we have a lot to discuss, don't we? [There's a slight pause. He should probably be polite and ask.] Did you -- were you okay? After I, you know, went.
I'm giving you the names of some people from my world. Just in case.
Harry Potter - Sanctimonious hero-type, absolutely clueless without guidance, which is interesting because I think he's trying to act independently these days. James Potter - Mostly remember him from school. Show-off who had it too easy in life and then he died. Lily Potter - Perfect prefect in school and stereotypical redhead. Not really remarkable up until she died with a tedious sacrifice. Remus Lupin - Future professor who likes books so much that I reckon he doesn't have any personality of his own without them. Relatively spineless. Sirius Black - Reckless, angry man with a lot of issues. Has a sense of humour, though. Hermione Granger - Annoying know-it-all who needs to learn to hold back her outbursts. Rash judgments despite being relatively intelligent, very emotional, which interferes with her logic.
And these two are a bit special:
Severus Snape - You met him. Slimy, treacherous git with no humour. Draco Malfoy - Cowardly rich snob, changed sides because he couldn't take the pressure. Transfigured him into a ferret once and I didn't have to change a lot, if you get my meaning.
[He's leaving two people out, well, three, for obvious reasons. Merope should be left out of all of this as much as possible, Voldemort is his true Master and Dumbledore... He requires special attention.]
What a thoughtful gift. Tell you, I'll repay the favour and throw you some names too!
The Doctor - I think there are maybe eight of them now but the numbers change ever constantly. They're all essentially the same but have fooled themselves into thinking they're very different. Also they argue a lot because everyone loves to loathe themselves.
To break them down into descriptions, there's the dork in the bowtie, Eleven, he's feisty. Hates you playing with his girls, bit like a super possessive pimp. Only an asexual one who controls everyone with firm disapproving glares on that twelve year old face of his. Six has an awful coat, an awful ego and an awful girlfriend. One of them looks like their granddad but he apparently fought in a war(?) maybe. Seems stroppy, don't remember meeting him. And then there's the youngest one that looks older than the oldest one. Eight is the one with the messiah complex. -- or that's actually all of them. I think he also has curly hair and a Victorian outfit.
You know, I need to fact check this stuff, I can't keep track. They're all basically the same. The younger ones tend to have more mercy though, keep that in mind.
Clara Oswald - Current companion? I think. Determined, clever, amusing, snarky but desperately eager to help and be kind. A little bossy too. Punches hard for a five foot nothing petite girl. Totally crushing on the Eleventh.
Rose - She's the one you tortured, remember? Ironic considering how much she loves your face.
Jamie - Scottish. That's all I really know.
...There are a lot of companions here and I can't even be bothered with writing about them all. Basically any female crushing on him counts.
Captain Jack Harkness - Total freak. No really, he is, he's completely wrong. Wears a big swishy coat and thinks he's got some level of control when he doesn't. An upgraded monkey. Also he has a little boyfriend, he's just welsh. Forgot the name again.
TARDIS - She was a ship, now she's human. I'm sure she has other noteworthy things.
Romana and Brax - lumping them together because this is getting very long and I'm losing interest. Basically they're from where I'm from and both believe they had some level of control there or something. I really lost touch with Gallifreyan politics after they had me killed. I wouldn't pick a fight, they could mentally outwit you any day.
[You know, he has a startling lack of knowledge of this stuff. He knows all the important stuff he can't share because that's for him to know and Barty to find out. But who they are as actual people and their personalities are very sparse and lacking in detail.
[Hello, Master! Guess who's possibly unnervingly calm face is on the screen?]
Just a friendly warning, Time Lord to Time Lord. I'm not sure even you'd be quite so stupid as to try it, but if Clementine is harmed in any way by you or someone you've convinced to do your dirty work for you, you will regret it.
For now, she is a smart child, and I've educated her on your true nature, and I see no harm in conversing with her where people can see you. She knows how to handle herself, and she knows what to do if you try anything. She's also disturbingly comfortable with a gun.
[He'll just leave the rest for the Master's imagination.]
And if I were you, I wouldn't make the mistake in making assumptions about my pacifist nature. I'm out of patience with the idea of giving anyone who has ideas about hurting those I care about a chance.
[The Master returns the message as a video, seemingly very pleased to do so. Hence the big grin he presents to the Doctor.]
I assume Clementine is that little girl with the walkie talkie? Hmm. Why do humans insist on naming their kids after fruit? Such a stupid practise, who loves a fruit that much? Or is it just human policy to destroy their children's lives with stupid names? I had a PR associate called Chrystal once, it was a baffling thing. Sounded like a stripper.
[He's casually not focusing on the threat or the topic at hand because he really had no idea and he seriously doesn't need a kids death on his hands. It'd ruin is reputation and he seriously wasn't up for being exposed this early.]
Don't get yourself tied up in knots, I'm shockingly not that invested in making friends with a child. I was just being nice. I'm allowed to be nice, aren't I? [They complain when he's evil, they complain when he's nice. He can't win.]
You know, I miss your tenth regeneration. Now there was a Doctor. The right mix of pacifism and hypocrisy. It was delightful. You're no fun.
[In honor of the Earth holiday centering on love, Freya sends out a little gift around this time.
A small box containing a piece of chocolate will appear on your pillow during the day. When consumed, the chocolate’s magic will lift your mood for a short period of time. It’s accompanied by a note.]
Where love might bring about sorrow, it also welcomes joy.
[ In honour of the god centering on love being a giant frilly prissypants, Loki sends his own little gift just a few hours after hers.
His box of chocolate will look, smell, and taste exactly like Freya's did, appearing right next to where Freya's was or is if you haven't picked it up yet. The only difference between the two is that Loki's won't lift your mood; it'll give you loud and embarrassing flatulence for the next three hours.
It's also accompanied by a note. ]
Where joy might bring about yearning, it also welcomes wonder.
[Fortunately a certain someone still hasn't mastered a human sleeping pattern so he's wide awake when he gets this. Well, awake anyway.]
You certainly kept your word. Kudos, not many people do.
I never toy with peoples emotions when it comes to ruining and destroying, especially not somewhere as arrogantly imposing as Asgard. Of course, the same goes to you, my new friend. I sincerely hope the enthusiasm is equally and genuinely shared. Otherwise I'll be very disappointed.
[It had taken Merope quite a while to work up the nerve to get in touch with Barty's friend and by then the flying debris didn't invite to strolls anymore, but now that everything is calming down call-me-Harry will find a message waiting for him. She certainly prefers him to the other Harry whose acquaintance she has unfortunately made.]
Dear Harry,
it looks like it is going to be a nice day for a stroll, would you care to accompany me to the library?
[There was something vaguely sad and out-dated about the way she texts but never the less, it amused him. Careful that Barty didn't see and cramp his plans, the Master decided to make plans fast and get this thing started.]
Hello Merope, I'm so glad to hear from you. Happy to see all is well.
I would love to accompany you, whereabouts can I meet you? I'm near Hel district right now but I can come anywhere.
hello suitemate
Please find another to use.
I have nailed your door shut to prevent any accidents from happening as a courtesy to you.
And then, as before, the following afterthought is added:
Why hello there
Hi JC. Don't ever touch anything of mine again. Including the door. Not even to knock it. No touchy! Not ever.
If you do, you may not like what happens next.
Play with nails again, you'll find yourself having an accident.
And nice try with the bathroom. It's shared, deal with it :)
All the love in the universe and best wishes, Harry Saxon xxx
I am so sorry for everything
This next note will be slid beneath the Master's door. ]
Fine. If you disturb my specimens, however, the next head I keep in a jar will be yours.
[ And the 'specimens' he is referring are probably easy to determine as the animal (and some human) parts floating in a viscous liquid, kept tightly sealed in jars and stacked decisively on one side of the sink. It is a clear declaration of possession: this side of the bathroom was his. Or, you know, that was what he was trying to imply, at least. ]
Never apologise for awesomeness
Re: Never apologise for awesomeness
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Hope you're still lurking about.
[Awkward pause goes here.]
I thought you might pop by for a visit later...maybe?
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[He doesn't really want to discuss what happened. Well, okay, he does. But not the dying part, more the drums part. But that could come later.]
A visit might be nice, we have a lot to discuss, don't we? [There's a slight pause. He should probably be polite and ask.] Did you -- were you okay? After I, you know, went.
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[She gets a little shifty at that, and just barrels right on past it.]
I'm at home now, if you'd like to stop by. It'd be nice to have a bit of a distraction, really.
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private text
Harry Potter - Sanctimonious hero-type, absolutely clueless without guidance, which is interesting because I think he's trying to act independently these days.
James Potter - Mostly remember him from school. Show-off who had it too easy in life and then he died.
Lily Potter - Perfect prefect in school and stereotypical redhead. Not really remarkable up until she died with a tedious sacrifice.
Remus Lupin - Future professor who likes books so much that I reckon he doesn't have any personality of his own without them. Relatively spineless.
Sirius Black - Reckless, angry man with a lot of issues. Has a sense of humour, though.
Hermione Granger - Annoying know-it-all who needs to learn to hold back her outbursts. Rash judgments despite being relatively intelligent, very emotional, which interferes with her logic.
And these two are a bit special:
Severus Snape - You met him. Slimy, treacherous git with no humour.
Draco Malfoy - Cowardly rich snob, changed sides because he couldn't take the pressure. Transfigured him into a ferret once and I didn't have to change a lot, if you get my meaning.
[He's leaving two people out, well, three, for obvious reasons. Merope should be left out of all of this as much as possible, Voldemort is his true Master and Dumbledore... He requires special attention.]
private text
The Doctor - I think there are maybe eight of them now but the numbers change ever constantly. They're all essentially the same but have fooled themselves into thinking they're very different. Also they argue a lot because everyone loves to loathe themselves.
To break them down into descriptions, there's the dork in the bowtie, Eleven, he's feisty. Hates you playing with his girls, bit like a super possessive pimp. Only an asexual one who controls everyone with firm disapproving glares on that twelve year old face of his. Six has an awful coat, an awful ego and an awful girlfriend. One of them looks like their granddad but he apparently fought in a war(?) maybe. Seems stroppy, don't remember meeting him. And then there's the youngest one that looks older than the oldest one. Eight is the one with the messiah complex. -- or that's actually all of them. I think he also has curly hair and a Victorian outfit.
You know, I need to fact check this stuff, I can't keep track. They're all basically the same. The younger ones tend to have more mercy though, keep that in mind.
Clara Oswald - Current companion? I think. Determined, clever, amusing, snarky but desperately eager to help and be kind. A little bossy too. Punches hard for a five foot nothing petite girl. Totally crushing on the Eleventh.
Rose - She's the one you tortured, remember? Ironic considering how much she loves your face.
Jamie - Scottish. That's all I really know.
...There are a lot of companions here and I can't even be bothered with writing about them all. Basically any female crushing on him counts.
Captain Jack Harkness - Total freak. No really, he is, he's completely wrong. Wears a big swishy coat and thinks he's got some level of control when he doesn't. An upgraded monkey. Also he has a little boyfriend, he's just welsh. Forgot the name again.
TARDIS - She was a ship, now she's human. I'm sure she has other noteworthy things.
Romana and Brax - lumping them together because this is getting very long and I'm losing interest. Basically they're from where I'm from and both believe they had some level of control there or something. I really lost touch with Gallifreyan politics after they had me killed. I wouldn't pick a fight, they could mentally outwit you any day.
[You know, he has a startling lack of knowledge of this stuff. He knows all the important stuff he can't share because that's for him to know and Barty to find out. But who they are as actual people and their personalities are very sparse and lacking in detail.
Maybe he should retry to get to know them all.]
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I have my doubts about that Doctor's asexuality.
You're so great at this.
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[Video]
Just a friendly warning, Time Lord to Time Lord. I'm not sure even you'd be quite so stupid as to try it, but if Clementine is harmed in any way by you or someone you've convinced to do your dirty work for you, you will regret it.
For now, she is a smart child, and I've educated her on your true nature, and I see no harm in conversing with her where people can see you. She knows how to handle herself, and she knows what to do if you try anything. She's also disturbingly comfortable with a gun.
[He'll just leave the rest for the Master's imagination.]
And if I were you, I wouldn't make the mistake in making assumptions about my pacifist nature. I'm out of patience with the idea of giving anyone who has ideas about hurting those I care about a chance.
video;
I assume Clementine is that little girl with the walkie talkie? Hmm. Why do humans insist on naming their kids after fruit? Such a stupid practise, who loves a fruit that much? Or is it just human policy to destroy their children's lives with stupid names? I had a PR associate called Chrystal once, it was a baffling thing. Sounded like a stripper.
[He's casually not focusing on the threat or the topic at hand because he really had no idea and he seriously doesn't need a kids death on his hands. It'd ruin is reputation and he seriously wasn't up for being exposed this early.]
Don't get yourself tied up in knots, I'm shockingly not that invested in making friends with a child. I was just being nice. I'm allowed to be nice, aren't I? [They complain when he's evil, they complain when he's nice. He can't win.]
You know, I miss your tenth regeneration. Now there was a Doctor. The right mix of pacifism and hypocrisy. It was delightful. You're no fun.
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You're allowed to be nice. Of course you are. It would even be smashing if you remained nice. I am simply being nice enough to give prior warning.
Master...I'm tired of the games. I won't play them with you. Maybe it makes me less fun than my tenth incarnation, but I've just...had enough.
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A small box containing a piece of chocolate will appear on your pillow during the day. When consumed, the chocolate’s magic will lift your mood for a short period of time. It’s accompanied by a note.]
Where love might bring about sorrow, it also welcomes joy.
backdated to Day 400
His box of chocolate will look, smell, and taste exactly like Freya's did, appearing right next to where Freya's was or is if you haven't picked it up yet. The only difference between the two is that Loki's won't lift your mood; it'll give you loud and embarrassing flatulence for the next three hours.
It's also accompanied by a note. ]
Where joy might bring about yearning, it also welcomes wonder.
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And why would I know what happened to your socks?
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day 411 , private video
Harry Saxon. I said I would be in contact.
I have not forgotten your enthusiasm at the prospect of the ruin of Asgard. I hope your feelings are still as sincere.
day 411, private video
You certainly kept your word. Kudos, not many people do.
I never toy with peoples emotions when it comes to ruining and destroying, especially not somewhere as arrogantly imposing as Asgard. Of course, the same goes to you, my new friend. I sincerely hope the enthusiasm is equally and genuinely shared. Otherwise I'll be very disappointed.
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Private Text
Stay away from my team. Network included.
private voice... because he loves the sound of it <3
[He laughs in a very cocky and obnoxious manner.]
Did you actually expect any other answer? Why would I ever stop?
Private Voice... egomaniac. >|
private voice; damn straight, deal with it
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Not deigning that with an answer
text; you know when
i don't think i need to clarify why i want this
that would be an insult to both our IQs
rude
being rude never pays off
[the screening process for alana being will is kind of laughable, he knows. but oh god, if these people really knew him...welp.]
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But you're paying.
And I'll expect flowers. And chocolates. If we're doing this, we're doing it right. Like you say, rude never pays off.
Just say when and where.
But I'll have to check my diary, it seems I have a new addition to my schedule these days.
text forever, etc.
ditto
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Sorry for the delay >>;;
[text] forward-dated to day 427
Dear Harry,
it looks like it is going to be a nice day for a stroll, would you care to accompany me to the library?
Yours faithfully
Merope
text;
Hello Merope, I'm so glad to hear from you. Happy to see all is well.
I would love to accompany you, whereabouts can I meet you? I'm near Hel district right now but I can come anywhere.
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Finally, a tag for you!
*turtles along*
/turtles after you